Let them lead.
Many times parents have come up to me and told me that worshiping and praying together as a family wasn’t working. Deflated and frustrated, they couldn’t figure out why. As I asked a couple questions, the reason clearly presented itself.
The parents were controlling everything.
They chose what their family would sing for worship. They chose what they would all pray together for. Their family was their little church congregation and the parents were on staff. The children just sat in the pews.
Many parents think their role in instructing their children in righteousness means their children watch while they make all of the “right” decisions. That’s how they will learn, right?
Not so much.
” But solid food is for the mature, for those who have their powers of discernment trained by constant practice to distinguish good from evil. ” Hebrews 5:14
Maturity doesn’t just happened by watching. It happens through PRACTICE. Through “constant use” as some translations say. Using the gifts, talents, callings and passions God has placed in you. In them.
Parents are afraid to let them lead, but our compulsive need to control everything is hindering our children’s spiritual maturity.
So take a step back, Mama. Let them pick the worship songs and sing along with them… even if those songs aren’t on the list of your favorites. Loosen your grip, Dad. Let them choose who to pray for and what to pray. Follow them. Let them lead.
We are called to submit to each other in Christ.
If my children are creating motions for a worship song, I will stand behind them and do the motions they are doing, even if they don’t make sense to me. Even if I could come up with something “better”. I let them lead. I follow.
This takes humility, and of course there are times when you need to step in and redirect. It’s a dance. They do learn from hearing you pray and watching you worship. But they will be far more receptive to your instruction on spiritual things when they feel powerful.
This is how you equip your children – put tools into their hands so they can build their life in God. So many times we want to build the house for them and design it the way we like it. We are here to guide them on the way they should go, not dictate every step.
Bill Johnson points out that David followed his sheep.
Psalm 78:70-71-
He also chose David His servant,
And took him from the sheepfolds;
71 From following the ewes that had young He brought him,
To shepherd Jacob His people,
And Israel His inheritance.
We too need to follow our sheep, letting them lead while we support and encourage their maturity in Christ.
Check out this video I did on the subject.
